Tuesday, September 26, 2017

Story Excerpt: Kinks

Author Note: I bet people are wondering why I have taken such a long gap of writing lately! I had promised to be active more however between thesis, motherhood and work it hasnt worked out that way. 

Additionally, I am at a point I think each writer is at ... am I really cut out for this route? I always question myself and compare to other writers. Yet I am learning that I should definitely need to stop that. My writing is great but I also need to have that confidence and put myself out there. So for anyone struggling out there! Just know you got this and NaNoWriMo is just a month away!!!!!!

Happy Writings! 

Mami always said “Donde hay hambre, no hay pan duro”.

As a young child it flew over my head what she was trying to explain. However, it didn’t make sense to me until I stood in front of the mirror. Tears brimmed my brown eyes and my nose was a bright red from irritation. Clumps of blonde frizzled hair were in the sink and blood stained my scalp.

Nothing ever made sense to me.


Desire and envy tend to meld into one in a moment that boiled over. Girls of yellow hair and blue eyes were perfection. Straight hair that embody Beyonce’s ‘I Woke Up Like This’ and thin frames the boys anticipated. I desired, those attributes yet I was given full wide hips and brown everything. Brown skin, brown hair, brown eyes, brown, brown, and more brown.

Puberty unfortunately destroyed my dreams when my hair curled at the sight of water and my body evolved. Swans could buy their jeans and cute flowy tops at boutiques while the need for a shirt to cover my ample chest was sparse. They flaunted down the hall in colors while I stood back draped in black.

How dare they paraded their gifts of beauty in my face. They flashed their peach color skin from their time at the beach in itty bitty bikinis. Morena. That was the nickname I received after coming back from Punta Cana. It chortled from Papi’s tongue and Alexis giggles while I glared. It was affectionate pero no quiero. However, it was still better than my actual name, Aruna. Similar to my Mami is trying to ruin my life with all these no and stop trying to be someone I am not. Pero Mami no quiero.

Unfortunately Papi promotion ten years ago allowed us to leave Florida and move here to Beverly Hills. It was a constant reminder that I did not belong here, and my features regrettably pointed that out to everyone around me.

I begged daily for something that would make me lighter, or as Alexis said Whiter. I ignored Alexis and Mami digas no. So I had to accept my skin while I watched the swans praise us with their presences.

So I avoided the sun when I could and when I couldn’t I spent hours scrubbing my skin after the beach. Months of allowance allowed me to buy a straightener from the beauty supply store with Hannah and Betty. Their parents paid for copious amounts of blow outs at the suave hair salon so they didn’t understand my need to hide it from my mother.